Hell hath no fury like a MONDAY Morning !

Originally written on January 23rd, 2008 as part of the ‘Monday Morning Blues’ contest in office…

Disclaimer: Suited for only discerning viewers with a sense of humour clip_image001

Every mortal irrespective of age, gender, vocation and position must have gone through this dreaded phenomenon seductively named, Monday Morning Blues, as if it were an exotic flower or a delectable flavour of an ice-cream. On googling ,a slew of results come up, which basically define MMB as “ a reluctance to wake up every Monday morning and drag yourself to work”.

Some among you don’t agree? No !  Don’t worry, your lead-PM/APM,  whoever it is will not deprive  you of  a better bucket if you accept the truth, though your carefully constructed image of a  go-getter and enthusiastic team-player ever ready to assume more responsibilities including being the chosen one to represent the entire team at the 6 am Monday  call, may take a beating. clip_image001

Ofcourse, I also don’t agree with the popular definition of MMB. Hey, don’t come to any hasty conclusions. Even during college or for that matter, school (sniff, sniff.. getting nostalgic),  I had an acute dislike for Monday. It is not just restricted to work.  To the bewilderment  of my parents, their perfectly healthy son who was jumping and hopping (naughty readers, I know what you are thinking !) during the weekends, sporadically  got tummy-aches on Monday morning, especially in those years which had  no PT class during  the day.  I conveniently put the  blame on Amma for having overfed me. The lady, though concerned was only too happy to shoulder it taking it as an affirmation of her ability as a good Mother. clip_image002

In my school, we were supposed to wear an all White uniform on Monday. I should confess, I liked this practice, the sight of the students standing prim and smart during the morning assembly presented a nice spectacle. But other than this, Mondays during schools have many bad memories for me. Have observed that, Mondays  share a disproportionately high share when it comes to  the reprimands dished out by my class teacher(all years) to poor meclip_image003. Maybe it is a case of MMB for her too, taking out her Blues on someone.

Also during one particular year(I think it was 8th std), Monday morning 1st period was biology where a  well-informed  lady  taught us, the mumbling students, the basics of creation of  life, right from amoeba, mitochandria to other complex thingsclip_image004. She had a bad habit of asking questions. Her appearance and demeanor would suggest she will be sympathetic to kids who would blabber some nonsense for an answer. She was anything but that ! I reiterate. I always had a feeling, she especially singled me out  for questioning. The lady should have had exceptionally good eyesight. Or else how do you explain her picking me  inspite of yours truly hiding behind the heads of classmates and  keenly peering  down   the science textbook, barely glancing at the lady. Her admonishments were known for their terseness. But it was as mighty effective as Kumble’s  “Only one team played in the right spirit”. Her disapproving looks  cut into my psyche like a warm knife through butter. My best friend and I promptly named her “The Silent Killer”. The name became a rage and I had some macabre satisfactionclip_image005.  I lived in mortal fear though.

XI and XII classes were a different league altogether and by this time, I had developed equanimity. All teachers, maths/physics……, alike, seemed to me like baying for my blood. The CompSki Sir was promptly named “Brute Force” for his frequent use of the same(word). The whole class took vile pleasure in calling the greatest terror of all, our respected Maths Madam-“Ultra-Vixen” giving a whole new morbid twist to her initials.

In school, the unit tests/assignments always started on a Monday and I don’t think, anyone but the nerd, who topped it looked forward to it. Admittedly, I was a good student. But I will be lying if I say, “Oh yeah, When will Monday come? Assignment starts Na”. After all this, will any soul blame me if I occasionally feigned sickness on Monday Morning, during school? Those of you, who don’t agree, I say,  ”You don’t have a  heart , Silent Killers”.

Mondays during college, though not exactly looked forwarded to, were definitely not as terrorizing and the period was uneventful, except for during 1st year which had the Mechanical workshop, at which I sucked.

Here at the workplace, I have noted that, most of my batch mates from Academy days heap all sorts of expletives on that day, unfortunately named Monday. The  stark contrast between the treatments meted out to Monday and other days, especially that lucky one named Friday is all the more evident as the week goes by, with the inbox being inundated with forwards celebrating that elusive lady Friday and deriding that  horrible villain-Monday . But of late, these forwards themselves are becoming more elusive. People are working too hard. clip_image006

Now, what is the solution to this modern urban phenomenon “Monday Morning Blues”? If you go by http://www.ehow.com/how_117079_beat-monday-morning.html , you will be mistaken into believe that MMB has a scientific cause to it and that it can be remedied by simply sleeping more on Monday. It is a whole lot of crap, I tell you.  People, honestly tell me. How many of you have a problem in hopping out of bed like a spring-chicken on a Monday, which happens to be a holiday and there is  a very interesting test-match/ any other activity which you passionately like? I don’t see much hands going up.  So the truth is finally revealed, most of us down here, are not exactly in love with our jobs. Only a lucky few are in a vocation they are passionate about and these folks won’t be experiencing MMB, I feel. As for the others, either get a job you loveclip_image007 or get to like the job you get.